Pippa Scott, Author
“For me, love meant enmeshment: dissolving into the other, becoming one. I borrowed whatever I admired in men and smoothed it onto myself like paste, hoping it might harden into identity, or, at the very least, acceptance.”
Pippa Scott is a writer and an award-winning photographer. As a singer, she has performed on BBC TV’s Star for a Night, trained on Broadway, and studied opera under a renowned contralto. She spent over a decade working in the film industry in London, New York City, and Los Angeles for agents, directors, casting executives, and talent. She lives in Canada with her two children.
Why do
paper girls burn?
Paper dolls are fragile, often two-dimensional, and closely tied to innocence and youth. They can be easily bent or altered to the whims of others’ fantasies. The slightest spark and they will go up in flames. All qualities that, to me, capture the borderline experience.
For many who share my diagnosis, there are moments of dissociation — a sense of being unreal combined with a hollow space inside that nothing seems to fill. This reflects a disconnect from oneself, a lack of a solid sense of identity, which can lead to bending oneself to meet the imagined desires of others. The emptiness eventually transforms into a constant state of attempting to re-create oneself into someone who is worthy of being loved.
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is often compared to being a third-degree burn victim: the outer layer of skin is gone and even the gentlest touch can feel unbearable. Emotions, without that protective layer, can feel like fire. Yet the fire carries a duality. While BPD brings profound challenges, it also brings gifts. Many who share this diagnosis are deeply perceptive, attuned to the emotions of others, and capable of illuminating what others cannot see. And beneath this fire there remains a lingering youthful innocence — the part of oneself that felt abandoned and continues searching for care and protection. All of these qualities — the fragility, the fire, the perceptiveness, the longing, and the chameleon-like tendency to reshape oneself are reflected in Paper Girls Burn.
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”It hurt so deeply because I was more than aware of my own neediness. It was true. And truths that you hate about yourself hurt the most.”
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“Since marrying Thomas, all black had become my uniform. He always said I looked best in it, said it enough that I stopped wearing anything else. Eventually, it became a constant funeral for what we called marriage.”